π loki odinson π (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dothelokimotion) wrote2020-04-18 07:42 am
dothelokimotion) wrote2020-04-18 07:42 am
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text β° voice β° holovid
text β° voice β° holovid
( most nights, thor wanders his way to loki's room, finding that his own is too large without anyone else to occupy it. of course, he grew up with more space than he ever knew what to do with, but he was rarely ever alone: if loki wasn't invading his rooms, then it was sif with her sword and promises of besting him; or the warriors three, always boisterous, bringing offerings of ale and tales of adventure; or a string of countless women (and on some occasions, men) tumbling in and out of his bed. so it feels almost hollow, this room, with its sterile white walls and artificial light. there's nothing of thor's life here, no trinkets or weapons, no trophies from distant planets ...
but there is someone down the corridor β and, frankly, thor's tired of visiting loki when there's plenty of room for them both here. (they haven't shared a room since they were children, but he doesn't see the point of wasting space, especially not when it's easier to fend off the nightmares with loki pressed against his chest, a warm reminder of the breath in his brother's lungs.)
so instead of getting up, thor sends loki a message. because sometimes communication between them is easier when they can't see each other and actually have the luxury of thinking about what they should say. )
You know, my quarters are larger.
( it's an invitation, should loki choose to accept. )
but there is someone down the corridor β and, frankly, thor's tired of visiting loki when there's plenty of room for them both here. (they haven't shared a room since they were children, but he doesn't see the point of wasting space, especially not when it's easier to fend off the nightmares with loki pressed against his chest, a warm reminder of the breath in his brother's lungs.)
so instead of getting up, thor sends loki a message. because sometimes communication between them is easier when they can't see each other and actually have the luxury of thinking about what they should say. )
You know, my quarters are larger.
( it's an invitation, should loki choose to accept. )
[ while loki hasn't wandered the corridors like a restless ghost, the restlessness hasn't left his veins. it hasn't been that long since he's been on a ship like this, dying on a ship like this. every sleep feels like his last and while he lacks thor's manic energy, loki feels the pull of it all the same.
but he's contrary. and loki finds it difficult to give way to his heart. sentiment, after all, got him killed. ]
Is that wise?
but he's contrary. and loki finds it difficult to give way to his heart. sentiment, after all, got him killed. ]
Is that wise?
Does it matter? I want you here, Loki.
( there's a weight to those words, a yearning that goes unspoken. he may not have mimir's wisdom, may not be all-father as odin was, but he's lived long enough to know that he and loki are usually better together than apart. he also knows loki well enough to know he wouldn't just do as thor says because he said so. )
Would you deny your king?
( though this is mostly meant to be a joke, an opening for one of loki's barbs, because thor still doesn't feel like a king in any right. )
( there's a weight to those words, a yearning that goes unspoken. he may not have mimir's wisdom, may not be all-father as odin was, but he's lived long enough to know that he and loki are usually better together than apart. he also knows loki well enough to know he wouldn't just do as thor says because he said so. )
Would you deny your king?
( though this is mostly meant to be a joke, an opening for one of loki's barbs, because thor still doesn't feel like a king in any right. )
[ his king. loki swallows, throat tight. it still hurts to speak and his feelings . . . his feelings tell him he should stay away from thor. he should do no more harm. he's done enough. he's not good enough. he's unworthy.
( but he wants to stay. and that hurts to know, that staying is what destroyed them. )
loki wraps his arms around himself, drawing in a shuddering breath. ]
It matters to me. A king should keep himself above all subjects.
[ and because he's not without humour, even when broken. ]
And I am no queen.
( but he wants to stay. and that hurts to know, that staying is what destroyed them. )
loki wraps his arms around himself, drawing in a shuddering breath. ]
It matters to me. A king should keep himself above all subjects.
[ and because he's not without humour, even when broken. ]
And I am no queen.
( in any other circumstance, thor might laugh and point out all the ways in which loki does resemble a queen, but tonight it doesn't feel particular appropriate, especially not when thor is trying to convince loki to join him here. )
No, you're Loki, prince of Asgard. And you were my brother long before you were my subject.
( which is to say: the same rules don't apply.
then, after a brief moment of consideration, he adds: )
This anomaly brought you back to me. Why would I think it unwise to keep you near?
No, you're Loki, prince of Asgard. And you were my brother long before you were my subject.
( which is to say: the same rules don't apply.
then, after a brief moment of consideration, he adds: )
This anomaly brought you back to me. Why would I think it unwise to keep you near?
[ loki considers listing all the reasons. he ruined everything. he ruined their people. he ruined their future. loki has ruined everything. but he didn't want to give thor those reasons. he didn't want thor to change his mind.
selfish. but he has always been that way. ]
Do you think it's a good idea?
[ an echo, do you think it's wise to bring me to earth? ]
selfish. but he has always been that way. ]
Do you think it's a good idea?
[ an echo, do you think it's wise to bring me to earth? ]
( his answer to that question seems like a lifetime ago now, and it's changed since then. loki died, horribly. they found themselves here. they most definitely aren't anywhere near earth. yes, the presence of several other avengers might complicate things, but that doesn't change thor's conviction. loki should be here, with him. )
The sun can't shine on us again if you keep to yourself, brother.
( an echo for an echo. )
The sun can't shine on us again if you keep to yourself, brother.
( an echo for an echo. )
[ that's unfair, using his own words against him. but loki knew he wasn't protesting much. ]
All right. I'll move in with you.
All right. I'll move in with you.
[ so demanding. but loki can't help feeling the slight brush of warmth. thor still wants him to stay. he can't be that bad, can he? anyway, he didn't have much in the way of goods and belongings so he finds himself quickly outside thor's door.
a beat. loki rests his palm on the door, letting in a deep breath. it'll be fine.
then he knocks. ]
a beat. loki rests his palm on the door, letting in a deep breath. it'll be fine.
then he knocks. ]
( so polite, knocking instead of just barging in like thor expected him to. he laughs to himself before he drags himself out of his bed to answer the door. in a way, this whole thing almost feels clandestine as loki so gracefully put it once β though loki moving in with him in the dead of night isn't exactly the same as enacting a treasonous plot to save asgard.
the door slides open, revealing thor grinning on the other side, smug in a way that's ultimately endearing. )
See? Much larger.
( not by much, but that's not the point. )
the door slides open, revealing thor grinning on the other side, smug in a way that's ultimately endearing. )
See? Much larger.
( not by much, but that's not the point. )
[ loki pointedly rolls his eyes before striding it and jousting thor in the process. ]
Yes, just the right size for your ego. I'm surprised you can bear parting with the space.
Yes, just the right size for your ego. I'm surprised you can bear parting with the space.
( did he deserve that? perhaps. but it's not going to stop the soft chuckle that escapes his throat. )
Oh, Loki...
( always with the jabs. and yet, it's so painfully fond, the way he says loki's name. he doesn't even have anything witty to say in response, so he simply follows loki further into the room, his face softening with something like nostalgia. he misses a lot of things (their home, the people they've lost), but most of all, at least at this particular moment, he misses his hair. he's still not quite used to the lack of it, still doesn't quite feel like himself without it. and it's strange how they've found themselves at a point now where loki's hair outlengthens thor's.
he reaches out, his palm brushing against a lock of loki's hair. )
How long has it been since you've worn braids?
( too long, he thinks. )
Oh, Loki...
( always with the jabs. and yet, it's so painfully fond, the way he says loki's name. he doesn't even have anything witty to say in response, so he simply follows loki further into the room, his face softening with something like nostalgia. he misses a lot of things (their home, the people they've lost), but most of all, at least at this particular moment, he misses his hair. he's still not quite used to the lack of it, still doesn't quite feel like himself without it. and it's strange how they've found themselves at a point now where loki's hair outlengthens thor's.
he reaches out, his palm brushing against a lock of loki's hair. )
How long has it been since you've worn braids?
( too long, he thinks. )
[ and suddenly loki stiffens, his breath caught in his throat. that hand drifted too close to his throat, too close and loki ruthlessly stifles the sudden panic that rises like a gorge. breathe.
this is safe. thor is safe.
it takes him a few moments too long, but loki congratulates himself for turning and fixing thor an odd stare. ]
Since Fandral thought it was funny to dip them with honey.
[ to sweeten his disposition, fandral had said with a wink. of course loki had gotten him back by putting beetles in his soap. ]
After that, it was simply easier not to bother.
this is safe. thor is safe.
it takes him a few moments too long, but loki congratulates himself for turning and fixing thor an odd stare. ]
Since Fandral thought it was funny to dip them with honey.
[ to sweeten his disposition, fandral had said with a wink. of course loki had gotten him back by putting beetles in his soap. ]
After that, it was simply easier not to bother.
( ah, of course. there's a pang in his chest at the mention of his old friend, but it eases him a little to know that one day they'll meet again within the halls of valhalla, that one day the'll all feast together again and recount the tales of glorious battle.
and if he noticed the way loki stiffened, he doesn't say anything about it. he thinks it's probably better not to. even as oafish as thor may be sometimes, he can surmise the reason why: a hand too close, a wound still too fresh. he'll have to be more careful. )
Fandral never was as funny as he thought. ( even if, most of the time, thor was laughing along with him anyway. but this isn't about fandral. ) Will you let me? Wear them in my stead, at least until my hair grows out.
( as if that's the only reason. as if it's not just because he wants to braid loki's hair. but he does, and he will, if loki allows it. )
and if he noticed the way loki stiffened, he doesn't say anything about it. he thinks it's probably better not to. even as oafish as thor may be sometimes, he can surmise the reason why: a hand too close, a wound still too fresh. he'll have to be more careful. )
Fandral never was as funny as he thought. ( even if, most of the time, thor was laughing along with him anyway. but this isn't about fandral. ) Will you let me? Wear them in my stead, at least until my hair grows out.
( as if that's the only reason. as if it's not just because he wants to braid loki's hair. but he does, and he will, if loki allows it. )
[ it was an odd request. certainly not one loki thought he'd even entertain, much less hear pass through thor's lips. but they're both scrambling for normalcy. or at least thor is. loki isn't sure what he's searching for, feeling more adrift than he usually was.
he gives a careless shrug. ]
Why not? Since we're both awake at an abysmal hour.
he gives a careless shrug. ]
Why not? Since we're both awake at an abysmal hour.
[ The message comes at an odd hour if there's such a thing as 3 a.m. in space. It is also unpreempted, almost as if she has had an earlier conversation with him that he was never made aware of. ]
Once we have the star map, you would know the way back to Asgard.
Once we have the star map, you would know the way back to Asgard.
[ this is definitely not a conversation he wants to have late at night, sharing quarters with thor. but he rarely sleeps or sleeps well as it is. ]
No. There is no way back to Asgard.
No. There is no way back to Asgard.
[ well. maybe. that depends on thor. it's highly unlikely loki will leave thor behind. though the urge is there to run, to hide, to burrow so deep thanos can't find him. ]
Possibly. We have to see where we end up first.
Possibly. We have to see where we end up first.
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